Scenes from drinks dinner with a woman who's far too attractive to be seen out in public with me:
"So why did you start to blog?"
"To pick up chicks."
"I dunno about that -- that whole dry reserved thing isn't really a chick magnet."
"I've noticed."
"So you actually want me to blog about this? Most women don't."
"Yes. And remember that it's all about me, me and me."
"I'll have the rack of lamb, medium rare -- more rare than medium."
"Roawr."
"Are you having a good time?"
"Oh yes, I most certainly am. For one thing, I'm still here. For another, it's nearly 10 o'clock and you haven't gone running screaming into the night yet. That's always a positive sign."
"Oh, I'm still working on my gin and tonic."
"Waiter, two glasses of pinot noir."
"And uh...."
"I'm sorry, am I distracting you?"
"Yes."
"Good."
"It shouldn't cost someone a hundred bucks just to get to know me."
"Well, then, today's your lucky day -- it's not a hundred bucks."
"Hey, we never did those tequila shots!"
"There's a bar near my house where I'm sure we could arrange for that to happen."
"Oh, I gotta get up early tomorrow and go to work."
"Nah, this is a great block. If I lived here, I'd never leave it. I mean you've got Lincoln Center, the Loews' Megaplex, Tower Records, Victoria's Secret -- all these entertainment options right here..."
"You are such a boy."
Ooh, ooh, will there be Date Two: The Sequel?
Ix-nay on the ecret-say f-oxnay ictoria-vay!
Yeah, have you called, or has she called? When's the next outing?
I have the theme music to all bad porn running through my head in honor of you. And a few juicy phrases from Young Frankenstein as well.