The official paulfrankenstein.org guide to deciphering what the other sex is saying:
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She says: "I'm not looking for a relationship right now."
She means: "... with you." |
He says: "I'm not looking for a relationship right now."
He means: "... just sex." |
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She says: "Size doesn't matter."
She means: "That's the smallest one I've ever seen." |
He says: "Size doesn't matter."
He means: "It's the smallest one you'll ever see." |
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She says: "I like you as a friend."
She means: "... a friend who's less attractive than a dead toad." |
He says: "I like you as a friend."
He means: "I'm lying." |
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She says: "It happens to lots of guys."
She means: "God, you're pathetic." |
He says: "This has never happened to me before."
He means: "Well, except for when..." |
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She says: "He's a nice guy."
She means: "He's a nice doormat." |
He says: "She's got a great personality."
He means: "I'm never going to go out with her again." |
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She says: "I'll call you."
She means: "Is it too late to erase my number from your Palm Pilot?" |
He says: "I'll call you."
He means: "In three days." |
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She says: "I'll call you tonight."
She means: "I'll call you at 11, because you should have called me first, you pig." |
He says: "I'll call you tonight."
He means: "... if I don't get too distracted by the hot bartender." |
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She says: "Oh, I wear this all the time."
She means: "... when I want to get some." |
He says: "Oh, I wear this all the time."
He means: "... and it hasn't been washed since the first Bush administration." |
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She says: "I love movies."
She means: "... like Sleepless in Seattle or Riding in Cars With Boys." |
He says: "I love movies."
He means: "... starring Arnold Schwarzenegger." |
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She says: "I like foreign films."
She means: "I like foreign films." |
He says: "I like foreign films."
He means: "... because girls dig guys who like foreign films." or He means: "... because someone's gonna get their kit off." |
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She says: "I love you."
She means: "I want to spend the rest of my life with you and bear your children." |
He says: "I love you."
He means: "I just had the world's worst case of brainlock and couldn't think of anything else to say." |
you forgot a few
She says: “I just need some time” She means: “If we spend some time apart you’ll see how good I am for you and pay more attention to me, once you realize what you’re missing.”
He says: “I just need some time” He means: “Far away from you, this is probably the beginning of the end.”
She says: “It’s not you, it’s me” She means: “It’s not you, it’s that I found someone better.”
He says: “It’s not you, it’s me” He means: “Of course it’s you, what was I ever thinking?”
She says, “How many people have you slept with?” She means, “If I ask him first, then I can tailor my number to be much less than his, and I hope it’s not too high, cause I’m really digging his vibe, and besides this will serve as a first good test of just how well he lies when I put him on the spot.”
He says. “How many people have you slept with?” He means, “I can’t believe she just asked me this question - I hope my answer was good enough to get her to sleep with me tonight. The only reason I’m even asking is because she expects me to ask even though I know she already has three answers waiting for me and wants to try one out - when the last thing in the world I want is to know how many, who, when or in what way some guy managed to get her naked - unless that story helps me do the same.”